Elle currently writes for various publishers. She loves strong heroines and sexy alpha heroes, and just enough heat and danger to keep things interesting! Whatever.” Rolling her eyes, Sasha steps forward and shakes out her arms like a boxer warming up for a fight. I grin at her visible nervousness. It’s cute. While I stretch out my six-foot-two frame amid the stuffed animals and decorative pillows on the bed, she remains the startled rabbit plastered against the door and breathing heavily.

Wanna dance?” he then asks, leaning toward my chest like he’s speaking into the box at a fast food drive-thru. I peer at the screen and groan. Oh man, it’s only eleven p.m.? I already feel a migraine coming on. The romance in The Darewas really enjoyable. I liked that Taylor and Conor were friends before anything. It added something more to their romance and I loved that. They were adorable together, it just made me smile. I love the fake dating trope and this was a fun way to look at it. The chemistry is very clear from the start and the reader gets to see both Taylor and Conor fall for one another. How did I go so long without noticing you, damn it? Why did it take seeing a stupid A on your midterm to make me notice?”

Don’t get me wrong, Sasha and I certainly aren’t fun-averse. We hang out at the campus bars, we do karaoke in town (well, she does, while I cheer her on from the safety of the shadows). Hell, we once got lost in Boston Common at three in the morning while stone-cold sober. It was so dark that Sasha accidentally fell into the pond and almost got molested by a swan. Trust me, we know how to hang. For me, well, I suppose I had grand designs of a college glow up. From high school loser to college It Crowd. A reinvention. Total life makeover. Thing is, joining their clubs and wearing their letters and enduring their weeks of sacramental indoctrination didn’t have the desired effects. I didn’t come out the other side all shiny and new. It’s like everyone else drank the Kool-Aid and saw the pretty colors, but I was just left standing there in the dark with a cup of water and red food coloring. Now let’s see…” Our house vice president puts one manicured finger to her chin and turns in a slow circle to survey the room, deciding on her first victim. “Who shall it be?” Ha! I knew you were into him! Oh my God! Hold my juice—I think I need to break out in a happy dance! Do you know how to do the running man? If so, can you teach me right now?” No, this is good,” she says. “Twenty minutes flat and those goons will have the keg killed. Then they’ll blow through whatever’s left of the liquor. I’d say that’s quitting time for me. Half-hour, tops.”

This has the desired effect of loosening her shoulders and even eliciting a shy smile. “I have no doubt.” A loud pop bursts through the house, causing everyone to cringe and cover their ears. Silence ensues in the confusion while our eardrums drown in the lingering echoes of tinnitus.Come on, Abs. Getting date-raped isn’t a party game.” Sasha steps forward, shielding me with her body. Just out of curiosity,” she says, “after you wake up in the morning, do you admire yourself in the mirror for one hour or two?” He sounds so genuinely upset that I scoot closer and kiss him. “It doesn’t matter. You know me now.” Horror slams into me as I register what I'm seeing. Oh God. I've stumbled onto a penis convention. Big penises and small penises and fat penises and penis-shaped penises. It doesn't matter which direction I move my head because everywhere I look I see penises.” I take a deep breath. My heart races. Already I feel my cheeks burning red. Abigail smiles at my discomfort like a shark alerting to the vibrations of a wriggling seal in distress. I brace myself for whatever evil endeavor she’s concocting for me.