Never. We never lose our loved ones. They accompany us; they don’t disappear from our lives. We are merely in different rooms.” – Paulo Coelho, Aleph Though I’ve never been one to ask for help, I decided to see a grief counselor. It was then that I realized I had gotten it all wrong. By internalizing everything that I was feeling, I was helping no one and was definitely not helping myself. Grief, I have learned, is not something we can shun or pass through. It is something that is a part of us and longs to be embraced. Ironically, I was able to feel genuinely happy for the first time only after I leaned in to my grief. In Ireland I read a tombstone. A man’s wife engraved a poem which said she had received many gifts; it ends, “but to have had you as my husband was the greatest gift of all.” It is near my darling wife’s grave. Reading it, I felt that sharing grief helped me, it was a sorrow shared and halved, but nothing removed that awful sense of loss. I believe I lost judgment, love of music, interest in news. By accident I came across the old song, Robin Adair, and the first line summed the feeling, “what’s this dull town to me, Robin’s not here.” Absolutely amazing. Marisa has transformed her own profound losses into a beautiful proclamation of the power of love. If you struggle with grief of any kind, this book will help you navigate it.” You see, love and grief are two sides of the same precious coin. One does not—and cannot—exist without the other. They are the yin and yang of our lives… Grief is predicated on our capacity to give and receive love. Some people choose not to love and so never grieve. If we allow ourselves the grace that comes with love, however, we must allow ourselves the grace that is required to mourn.” – Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph. D.

Coping with Grief and Loss - HelpGuide.org Coping with Grief and Loss - HelpGuide.org

Touching poems about grief and bereavement are a great way to find the words and feelings you may have been struggling to express. So try the range of grief poems below. Retrograde amnesia makes it difficult for a person to recall experiences before a specific point in time. But treatment is available to improve your… READ MORE Tips for coping with the grief that can resurface even years after you’ve lost a loved one. (Mayo Clinic) The pain at a significant loss may never completely disappear, but it should ease up over time. When it doesn’t—and it keeps you from resuming your daily life and relationships—it may be a sign of complicated grief.

When you part from your friend, you grieve not; For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain.” ― Khalil Gibran We need to grieve the ones we’ve lost — not to sustain our connection to suffering, but to sustain our connection to love.” – Jennifer Williamson Take just a moment to share these quotes on your preferred social media platform so that others who are going through this difficult time can find some comfort and support. Everyone must leave something behind when he dies, my grandfather said. A child or a book or a painting or a house or a wall built or a pair of shoes made. Or a garden planted. Something your hand touched some way so your soul has somewhere to go when you die, and when people look at that tree or that flower you planted, you’re there.” ― Ray Bradbury Remember, the intensity of grief does not last forever. The love you have for your loved one will. Holding onto grief is not holding on to love - survivors' guilt is a thing! Eventually, you will learn to live around the grief, influenced by the legacy and love of your beloved.

Grief is Love with No Place to Go - Mindful Grief is Love with No Place to Go - Mindful

In 1969, psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross introduced what became known as the “five stages of grief.” These stages of grief were based on her studies of the feelings of patients facing terminal illness, but many people have generalized them to other types of negative life changes and losses, such as the death of a loved one or a break-up. The five stages of grief The pain of grief can often cause you to want to withdraw from others and retreat into your shell. But having the face-to-face support of other people is vital to healing from loss. Even if you're not comfortable talking about your feelings under normal circumstances, it's important to express them when you're grieving. Grief comes up a lot in my work as a therapist. Often at first glance, however, neither I nor my client recognizes it as grief. We tend to associate grief with death, but not all grief involves the death of a loved one. Grief is a most peculiar thing; we’re so helpless in the face of it. It’s like a window that will simply open of its own accord. The room grows cold, and we can do nothing but shiver. But it opens a little less each time, and a little less; and one day we wonder what has become of it.” ― Arthur Golden

Even subtle losses in life can trigger a sense of grief. For example, you might grieve after moving away from home, graduating from college, or changing jobs. No truth can cure the sorrow we feel from losing a loved one. No truth, no sincerity, no strength, no kindness can cure that sorrow. All we can do is see it through to the end and learn something from it, but what we learn will be no help in facing the next sorrow that comes to us without warning.” ― Haruki Murakami Don't let anyone tell you how to feel, and don't tell yourself how to feel either. Your grief is your own, and no one else can tell you when it's time to “move on” or “get over it.” Let yourself feel whatever you feel without embarrassment or judgment. It's okay to be angry, to yell at the heavens, to cry or not to cry. It's also okay to laugh, to find moments of joy, and to let go when you're ready. It hurts because it mattered, and it will always matter. I've learned that grief is another name for Love and that no matter how deep your grief makes a home in you, love will always leave a window open. A window for fresh air in the middle of the storm, for a hope that comes after you've lost all hope.

The Love We Only Find In Loss - Whats your Grief The Love We Only Find In Loss - Whats your Grief

Can anyone understand how it is to have lived in the White House and then, suddenly, to be living alone as the President's widow?” While sharing your loss can make the burden of grief easier to carry, that doesn't mean that every time you interact with friends and family, you need to talk about your loss. Comfort can also come from just being around others who care about you. The key is not to isolate yourself. So often we try to make other people feel better by minimizing their pain, by telling them that it will get better (which it will) or that there are worse things in the world (which there are). But that’s not what I actually needed. What I needed was for someone to tell me that it hurt because it mattered.” – John GreenDisenfranchised grief can also occur when your relationship to a deceased is not recognized. Some people may consider it inappropriate to grieve for a work colleague, classmate, or neighbor, for example. As a close friend or same-sex partner you may be denied the same sympathy and understanding as a blood relative. This can make it even more difficult to come to terms with your loss and navigate the grieving process. Complicated grief