Louise Michelle Bombèr, Adoption Support Teacher for Brighton and Hove, Attachment Support Teacher Therapist for The Yellow Kite Attachment Support Service Tal Ben-Shahar (Hebrew: טל בן-שחר‎, also known as Tal David Ben-Shachar) is an Israeli teacher and writer in the areas of positive psychology and leadership. Tl;dr - This book is very lauded. I thought it was pretty good, especially the little touches Gliori makes on the illustrations. However, for grief books I'd look elsewhere. Every time I say that I am through with reading self-help books, then another one falls into my lap. The author did make a good point of creating a "reverse day planner" wherein you log what you are doing for every hour of the day after you do it, which allows you to better assess retroactively how efficiently you're using your time. I like the idea of this, but personally I find it quite hard to strictly schedule my time, because I prefer to go on outdoor runs, which are highly contingent on weather and my general level of busyness. That, plus other contingent/difficult to plan issues (how long will cooking take? will it just be reheating leftovers or making something brand new? what about going to the store?). When I try to plan I inevitably find too many floating items for it to really be helpful, so I just eventually give up and only schedule out the big things that don't change... which doesn't help me.

We learn from Sally that adopting children who have suffered neglect and abuse, requires not only resilient parents but expert advice, support and understanding from a range of professionals and from family and friends. One section stopped me short while reading, since it felt un-childlike, and in a different tone than the rest of the book, almost formal: “But does love wear out? Does it break or bend? Can you fix it or patch it? Does it mend?” I would have preferred the text to flow more easily. Still, all the answers are reassuring, and answer questions that many children may not even be able to express–such as knowing that the parent will still love the child, even if they are away from them. However, I do still have mixed feelings about this book. Some minor things I did not like were the repetition as well as the last few chapters going into her own Great Projects to help others write more. And also the way she portrayed fiction writers - there were some remarks when quoting writing advice by Stephen King for example, where she suggested academics have a harder time writing because they also do other things and are not full-time writers. That I thought was a low blow: most fiction writers are not Stephen King, aka. most fiction writers are also juggling a thousand things in their life while writing. Sigh. I didn't see this as a grief/death thing at all, instead I interpreted it as a "someone's moved away" scenario. I guess you could be very liberal with your interpretation and see this as dealing with grief/death, but it's not explicit enough for me and this does NOT count as a "help your child cope with grief" book for me at all.In America, not having a college education is a curse. One big curse that could not be fixed by attending some inferior programme at a community college, that serves, more or less as a half-way house to gangsterism, prison and sure death or some lay job with a welfare eventuality. Lisa’s lay job needed some heartless attitude – they were collecting money from defaulters, and Lisa was too sweet to her clients. That was bad for this business. Tal received his PhD in Organizational Behavior from Harvard University. His dissertation, completed in 2004, is titled "Restoring Self-Esteem's Self-Esteem: The Constructs of Dependent and Independent Competence and Worth." Additionally, he also holds a Bachelor of Arts (B.A.) from Harvard in Philosophy and Psychology. His undergraduate thesis, completed in 1996, is titled "Honesty Pays: Bridging the Gap Between Moral Theory and Practice." Lisa snapped out of her misery and decided to own her problems so she could do something about them. And she did. Normally, when this happens, the rest as they say becomes history and people go on to make it big in the area of motivational speaking and use their story as a reference point: throw in the sexual molestation she experienced at age five, and the picture is complete. This is the ordinary model and of course Lisa was also sexually molested when she was only five! With great humility Sally shares her journey of courage, hope and persistence in boldly loving her children despite the odds, no matter what...Throughout the book I laughed and cried, experiencing the highs and lows of loving children who have lived the unthinkable. For too long adopters walked this journey very much alone. We must now accompany them on this journey, in our neighbourhoods, communities and cities, and within our education, social care and health services. Together we can make a difference; each life is precious, however fragile and different. No Matter What communicates this truth, and is an important contribution at this time of policy change.

If you've ever wondered what it's like to adopt, this book holds the answer: it's hard, sometimes traumatic, and far from "normal family life". It's also special, joyful, and utterly transformative - for parents as much as children. Yes our families are different; this book explains in both a moving and matter-of-fact way why we are proud to be so. Everyone should read this funny and deeply moving account of modern adoption: the highs, the lows, the risks and the rewards. Sally's writing is honest, insightful and beautiful to read. Having wandered around academia for the last 5 years, I have experimented with writing, working and academic productivity techniques a lot. The main reason is that I had the gut feeling (equally close to wishful thinking) that the competitive environment we academics live in, should not lead to a life of stress, bad writing and a tilted work-life balance. From this perspective, 'Write No Matter What' felt like a small victory, a very personal 'see-I-told-you-so!' that strengthens my beliefs and quest for an ever more productive - and hence mentally healthy - academic life. Lastly I want to talk about two ideas in Part 4, the section devoted to maintaining writing momentum, which I found quite interesting. The first is what Jensen calls "follow the lilt", where the lilt is a cheerful or lively voice when one is describing something interesting, enjoyable or highly engaging. By identifying the lilt in speech, you are able to spot potential future projects for yourself and in others. Follow the lilt.One time I saw an advert whose image has remained indelibly etched on my memory. The photo had a squirrel about to crush a nut with a pair of pliers. It had one more thing a short caption that read: ‘Unfair advantage.’ That is exactly what I would have said about Lisa Nichols if her book came out the way her speeches do. But nonetheless, she put together an awesome book with ideas and counsel that oozes, not only wisdom, but also great business ideas and models for the many young people I see going about starting their motivational speaking careers the wrong way. Not a big fan of self-help book myself but this one is exceptional. Found out about Lisa from her powerful speeches available online and from thereon I knew she'd be my go-to reference in the subject of "dream big". I am, and will remain, totally in awe of Sally and her husband Rob. Their empathy and resilience is sure to inspire anyone who reads this book, particularly those thinking about adopting a child. With a title focused on writing, and a chapter devoted to 'Using tools that work', I was nevertheless a little bit disappointed with the actual writing (productivity) techniques. She touches upon the fundamental use of a 'project box', for example, but is at the same time very prescriptive (this is what you should do) and vague (I won't tell you exactly how to) in explaining how this works. Given that I already use some version of this project box (digitally, not materially), I have an idea about how this works in practice (and that it does!), but she gives very little information about how to use this core 'taming technique'. Her approach to self-growth is so powerful, that I realized I've been neglecting myself way too much all this while and now I need to thank this book for waking me up to start 'doing myself' first, only by doing so I can serve my purpose and enrich others.